5. be honest, you did NOT watch the vmas because you were probably drunk with us at the show last night. so you need an extra day of continously looped vma coverage to sift and analyze britney spears' donatella versace-carnival cruiseline dance troupe inspired-sequenced tart-"i'm trying really hard to act like its not 1998"-dress. and her putative, hypothetical comeback (veit is holding a vigil, contact her for RSVP and info.)
4. everyone in hialeah has to go back and return all the cute stuff they bought at forever 21 during the labor day sale. this is what happens when fortune 500 companies attempt to sophisticate the callow gluttons of miami's suburbs. starbuck's orange mocha coffee cake-carrot-reduced fat blueberry-iced muffins and cookies make that size 3 look like a conjugal visit from an ex boyfriend. an exboyfriend with alarming fashion and lurid facial hair.
3. after my usual aghast at the immoral time i get up for work, i drove off into the pussiant miami beach winds. shorty after, i made my anticipated arrival at the walgreens on US1 for some laughs, some old friends and diet green tea. to my idyllic surprise, they already capaciously stocked up on halloween candy. tomorrow i am designating each of you to your local vendor so that you may envelop the granular decadance of pleasance that is candy corn pumpkins.
2. OBVIOUSLY YOU ALL USED TOO MUCH BLOOD IN YOUR COCONUT-MALIMBO-FUFU MAGIC (although i specifically said not too)!!! and so, we had work today. i will not pardon you, but i shall give you an extra day to contemplate on your blunder of carelessness. thus, i adhere you to a diet of the aforementioned pumpkins and uninterrupted ROCK OF LOVE loopage.
1. on septemeber 9th the treaty of neuberg was signed splitting the austrian habsburg lands between the habsburg dukes albert III and leopold III in 1379; direct translation--HURRICANE PARTY/HAPPY HOUURR WOOOOOOO LEEEEEETZ GOOOOOOOOOO
Monday, September 8, 2008
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